Whazzup???

Here’s an important rule for life: It’s not all about you. To develop a thick skin you must first remember that you are not the center of the universe. Yes, sorry to say, you are not the fixed point around which the universe turns. Say someone isn’t paying you enough attention. You brood and brood. "Is she mad at me?" "Did I say something wrong?" Your gloomy thoughts intensify, leaving you emotionally crippled and thinking that you have ruined everything

Yet there may be a good reason for her inattention. Maybe she’s having rough week at work, and she has 10 projects to complete by Friday. All of which are putting her in a foul mood. Or think about it in another way. Maybe she is behaving badly and being a jerk. But why are you fussing over it? If this is how your mind works, you may indeed be overly thin-skinned. And some rethinking is in order. You will need to learn a few skills and think outside yourself

Don’t take things personally
Sometimes you may need to reframe a person’s bad behavior by remembering that it’s not about you

Don’t let others get to you
Refuse to get overly responsive to the negative feelings and provocations of others. Adopt strategies that regulate emotional arousal; otherwise negativity hijacks the thinking brain. Try simple, deep breathing or declare a time out

Remember that everyone gets rejected sometimes
Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and move on. Don’t be discouraged if it takes a few times to get it right. Successful people are rejected over and over, but never stop trying

When you’re rejected or something doesn’t go your way, counter-propose a new solution
Often, the person declining your offer is not rejecting you. He/She may even want to hear another idea. Successful individuals come back from rejection with new proposals. They’re creative at coming up with additional ways of looking at things and solving problems.

Don’t be self-focused
If you do focus on yourself, you’ll likely dwell on your shortcomings. Instead, think about your goals and what steps you need to get there

Don’t worry about looking stupid
If you are asked a question and you don’t know the answer, you can simply say, "I need to think about that and get back to you later"

Don’t be quick to blame
Recognize that other people have their ups and downs

Think about others
Enter social interactions with this thought of making the experience itself enjoyable. Ask yourself, "What can I do to make you feel more comfortable?"

Learn to be patient
Don’t be impulsive or react to a situation without giving yourself time to cool off

Stop the self-talk
Counter self-defeating self-talk with truth-talk: "You can be your own worst enemy, so give yourself a break"